fruitcake in my stocking

***

phenomenon #5 – Eggnog and Fruitcake

The fifth and final Christmas phenomenon (for this season at least) involves two traditional holiday treats people either completely love or absolutely hate. It’s a rarity to find someone wavering between the two extremes and converts to either side just don’t exist. This kind of polarity and their ‘unique’ mix of respective ingredients are what give them a rightful phenomenal status on the thirsty camel.


Eggnog
Sugar, milk, whipping cream, nutmeg, cinnamon - it doesn’t matter how you dress it up, you’re still drinking raw eggs mixed with hard liquor. Because of this, I have a strong suspicion, despite what historians say, that eggnog came about as the result of a very clever dare…

Fruitcake
For many, fruitcake is like the dentist of holiday treats: an uncomfortable reality you have to come to terms with at least once a year. Little known by the general population, Santa once used fruitcake instead of coal to fill the stockings of bad children. But he had to stop when he realized the naughty ones were making a good business by selling it to their parents (because, as we all know, adults love to eat the things kids hate – ie lima beans). Unfortunately, this business flourished and fruitcake is now interwoven into our Christmas consciousness.

There are others, though, who consider a loaf of spongy bread filled with alcohol-soaked fruit bits and teeth shattering nuts nothing short of mouth euphoria. Weirdos for sure, but without them to make a case for the squishy Cake of Fruit, a little piece of what makes the Christmas season unique would be lost.



With that, I hope your Christmas of 2009 was warm and cuddly as an ugly Christmas sweater, bright and hopeful like a house covered in Christmas lights, delicious and messy like Christmas cookies, not as naughty as the suggestive Christmas song but just as unique as eggnog and fruitcake.

Merry Christmas.

***